What I've learned so far

I read an article the other day entitled 'Lessons at the Halfway Point'. It was from the Reader's Digest and was an excerpt from the book 'Michael Levine'. It just got me thinking about things I've learned as, nearing 50, I'm past the halfway point for sure. So here we go.

On raising children:

* No can be a complete sentence.
* You need to be a mother, not a friend.
* If you feed your child Lucky Charms cereal and then put him on the tilt 'o whirl, he will spew rainbow puke over the rest of the riders.
* If you use bad words around your children. They will use them at the most embarrassing, inappropriate time possible.
* You need to run in the pouring rain and splash through the puddles sometimes. Those are the things they'll remember.
* It's quantity & not quality that counts when it comes to time. Quality can't be scheduled. If you're there for your children always, the quality times will just happen.
* Dish soap in the mouth of a child that said a bad word is not child abuse. It's actually amusing if you make them drink some water. They bubble.
* Sometimes it's easier to throw the underpants away than to try to clean them. It's almost always better to try to clean the child, however.

On life in general:

* If you run to the store in a ratty tee shirt and no earrings, you'll see several people you know.
* There is no arguing with ignorance.
* You can't make people like you. More important, it doesn't matter.
* If you pee on a ground bee nest they will sting you. It will hurt. A lot.
* If your father and your husband are fixing the gas grill and you hear 'OK son, I've got hold of the wire with my fingers, go ahead and hit the starter button', followed by 'OK Dad', you should holler STOP really loud.
* If your father wants to help you with home maintenance, even though he can't fix anything at all, and it will take you 7 times longer, let him. He won't be here forever and you'll treasure the time you spent with him.
* If you clean your house spotless nobody will stop by for a visit. If, however, your house is a pig sty, you're sure to get company.
* If you lie, you will get caught. It will be embarrassing. It's much easier to tell the truth.
* Life is very, very short. Do it all while you can. There will be time to clean the house when you're old. If you want a cookie, have one. You could be dead tomorrow. Tell your friends and family you love them. Often. You might not always have the chance. You always have today, but one day, you won't have tomorrow.

I'm sure I've learned more, but as I've said, I'm nearing 50 and I've probably forgotten the rest!